{"id":4418,"date":"2019-07-14T12:52:40","date_gmt":"2019-07-14T12:52:40","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/trump-kennedycenter.org\/?page_id=4418"},"modified":"2026-03-13T08:55:32","modified_gmt":"2026-03-13T08:55:32","slug":"home","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/trump-kennedycenter.org\/","title":{"rendered":"Home"},"content":{"rendered":"

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Resistance<\/i><\/span><\/h1>\n

We had hoped that we could sponsor some of our resistance heroes with your donations. We couldn’t quite hit the threshold. So you fuckers need to donate more. Meanwhile, go visit Pod Save America<\/a> and The Bulwark<\/a>.[\/vc_column_text][\/vc_column][vc_column width=”1\/6″][\/vc_column][\/vc_row][vc_row full_width=”stretch_row_content” _et_uniqid=”et_custom_uniqid_new_6946c2849794e”][vc_column]\t\t\t

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\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\n\t\t\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t\t
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\"\"New Straits<\/h2>\n
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People have been wondering if there is a solution to the blocked Straits of Hormuz. There’s an obvious one – if we burn all the fossil fuels a little bit faster, we could raise sea levels by 150 meters, thus creating a new channel in the Rub’ al Khali.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

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\"\"Apologies<\/h2>\n
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We’ve been busy trying not to fall over in the shoes the President gave us, which we are too scared to take off, because we’re definitely not in a mafia-state run by a cult. In actual fact, we are just busy trying to transition this site to a new provider after we encountered a few technical issues.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

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Cat More Interesting<\/h2>\n
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I mean, honestly. She’s waaay more fun. She’s not bombing anybody. She’s never been accused of raping any 13-year olds. What’s not to love?<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

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Noemeo and Juliet
\nLewandowski<\/h2>\n
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She’s keeping a stiff upper lip after her dismissal. Also a stiff upper forehead and cheekbones. Juliet Lewandowski can’t help himself. so takes the poison.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

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\"\"Site Goes Quiet – Cat Blamed<\/h2>\n
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We’ve had a few days break from publishing, not because we’ve been overwhelmed by the news (as so often happens), but because my cat knocked a full glass of Gr\u00fcner Veltliner all over my keyboard, which fritzed. Back to normal service tomorrow \ud83d\ude42<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

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\"\"Get Checked!<\/h2>\n
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For absolutely no reason whatsoever, we are reminding you to get regularly checked for STDs. For information, this is what a syphilitic rash looks like, typically on the neck or shoulders. Late-stage syphilis can cause heart disease, stroke, blindness, deafness, and dementia. Again, no particular reason for mentioning it.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

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\"\"Irony Is So Dead<\/h2>\n
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Russia condemns the attack on Iran, “a sovereign nation and member of the U.N.” Trump says Iran should have talked earlier. They did, President Cankles, it was called the JCPOA and you tore it up. Irony has died so many times in the last few days that we need to rename it ‘Kenny’ from South Park.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

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\"\"The Boss<\/h2>\n
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We know we already honored the great Bruce Springsteen back in 2009, but this is The Boss at his finest. – angry, passionate, righteous, singing through the bloody mist in the winter of ’26, to honor Alex Pretti and Renee Good.
\nWatch here.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

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\"\"Venue Change<\/h2>\n
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You may have read that the next two Trump-Kennedy Center Honors will be at a smaller venue. We are pleased to announce that the 2026 Honors will, obviously, be in the car park of Four Seasons Total Landscaping, in Holmesburg, Pennsylvania. Expected Honorees include Mel Gibson’s bartender, Nikki Minaj’s convicted-rapist husband and Kid Rock’s former crack dealer.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

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\"\"The Time Traveler’s Prime Minister<\/h2>\n
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In which Bibi Netanyahu has it slowly explained to him that Iran cannot possibly have been ‘weeks away from a nuclear bomb’ since 1995. This play replaces ‘The Boy Who Cried Wolf, But Kept Getting Away With It For 31 Years’.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

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\"\"Operation ‘Epstein Fury’<\/h2>\n
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The ‘Peace President’ has launched a war on Iran, because Netanyahu told him to. ‘Operation Epstein Fury’ is designed to blow some things up to make good TV, so that he can then declare an end to a war he started.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

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\"\"There’s Always A Tweet<\/h2>\n
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‘Nuff said.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

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\"\"Dude, Where’s My Offer?<\/h2>\n
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Toby Morton<\/a> has apparently been offered $30,000 for his still as-yet unpublished trumpkennedycenter.org<\/a> site. How come we’ve not had an offer? We’d seriously think about it for the knock-down price of $29,995.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

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\"\"Stay Safe!<\/h2>\n
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It’s 32 inches and supremely white. No, don’t worry, Greg Bovino isn’t coming to town, it’s a snowstorm! Please stay safe. If you can, shelter in The Epstein Files, as they’re still the safest place to be in America.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

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\"\"Why Spelling Matters<\/h2>\n
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President Trump, a man mentioned 38,000 times in the Epstein Files, pictured here surrounded by miners.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

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\"\"Measles: An Announcement<\/h2>\n
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With record numbers of measles cases in the first 60 days of 2026, we are excited to announce that the Department of Health & Human Services (pictured: Secretary Vintage Leather Handbag Jr.) has taken steps to rename the morbilli rubeola<\/em> virus as “Freedom Freckles”<\/strong>.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

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\"\"We’ve Always Been At War With Eastasia<\/h2>\n
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As the Commander-in-Chief readies for war with Iran, we remember how many times the administration swore blind <\/em>that the attack in June had “completely obliterated” Iran’s nuclear program. It’s almost as if they were lying then, or maybe lying now, but which is it? Our answer: likely both.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

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\"\"Hey America!<\/h2>\n
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Look how easy it is.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

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\"\"RFK Jr and Kid Rock<\/h2>\n
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We just wish to make clear: rumors that this was the original soundtrack<\/a><\/strong> to the MAHA video are entirely unfounded. (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

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\"\"Lent<\/h2>\n
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Like a Presidential Prayer Breakfast, we have absolutely nothing to do with religion. However, this year for Lent, we plan to give up movable liturgical observances.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

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\"\"RIP Jesse Jackson<\/h2>\n
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We’re pleased to share President Trump’s thoughts on the passing of civil rights hero Jesse Jackson: “I never liked far-left lunatic Jesse Jackson, he was my least favorite of The Jacksons. I much preferred Michael, especially when he stopped being black. Even Tito and Jermaine were more talented. Thank you for your attention to this matter.”<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

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\"\"CBS Censorship<\/h2>\n
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The kneepad toadies at CBS told The Late Show at Stephen Colbert that they couldn’t air an interview with Texas State Rep and mid-term candidate James Talarico in what feels an awful lot like partisan censorship. Thankfully you can watch it on You Tube<\/a><\/strong>.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

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\"\"Nuremberg<\/h2>\n
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Now showing: In which Russell Crowe plays Hermann G\u00f6ring testifying while having a meltdown and screaming at the trial lawyers.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

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\"\"Ridicule is Important<\/h2>\n
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History tells us that making fun of authoritarians is actually a key part of their downfall. We’ve made a bunch of money from your donations, and we plan to put it to good use. Hopefully you’ll be seeing even more of us soon \ud83d\ude00 Keep donating<\/a><\/strong>, unlike some Presidents we could mention, we’re not in it for the grift, and you’ll soon see where we spend the $$$ to keep putting the fight to this regime.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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\"\"Lyin’ Barbie<\/h2>\n
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Now available in two different ages! Pull the string on her back and sycophantic lies will just come spewing out, every third time will result in a temper-tantrum projecting their inner guilt and shame. *Not safe for girls under 18 years of age.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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\"\"Superb Owl<\/h2>\n
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Bad Bunny: peak viewing figure 127 million.<\/div>\n
TPUSA peak viewing figure 6.1 million<\/div>\n
We don’t care too much for the Super Bowl, as you can’t convince us it’s a real sport, but don’t you think it’s crazy how the people who want a separate halftime show are the same people who want separate water fountains?<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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\"\"A Parody Break<\/h2>\n
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So much insanity to satirize, the racist gorilla video, the laughable National Prayer Breakfast, ICE not receiving their signing-on bonuses, more Epstein Files content… But we’re having a well-earned weekend rest. Please support us by Buying Us A Coffee<\/a>.<\/strong><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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\"\"Cool Daddy Cool<\/h2>\n
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We are so pleased to see the line-up for the TPUSA ‘alternative half-time show’. We’re getting ready to sing along to headliner Kid Rock: “Young ladies, young ladies, I like ’em underage, see some say that’s statutory (But I say it’s mandatory)”<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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\"\"“Got Nothing On Me”<\/h2>\n
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Other than the 38,000 references to you in 5,300 different pages, sure. We agree it’s time to ‘turn the page’ on the Epstein Files. Sadly you’re on the next page too, Mr. President.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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\"\"Every Accusation Is A Confession, Pt II (Epstein Boogaloo)<\/h2>\n
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“You know why you’re not smiling? Because you know you’re not telling the truth. You’re very dishonest and they should be ashamed of you.”<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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\"\"DEFCON: Brown<\/h2>\n
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A live teleplay about how President Trump definitely didn’t shart so badly the room had to be evacuated immediately. Sponsored by Depend XXL.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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\"\"Come Again?<\/h2>\n
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A courtroom drama in which “well ACTUALLY, I’ll have you know that I could be a pedophile all by myself without any help from Jeffrey” turns out not to be quite the defence Elon thinks it is.<\/div>\n
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\"\"Seems A Bit Extreme<\/h2>\n
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Seems we’ve been run into the ground faster than a Trump Casino. We know this site must be embarrassing for the Il thin-skinned Duce and his administration, but surely it would’ve been cheaper to just buy the domain names in the first place?<\/div>\n
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\"\"Failure to Launch<\/h2>\n
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Not all satire is built the same. Some of us have been out here in the trenches publishing at least once per day since 22nd December. Others still have a holding page that says ‘Coming in January’ on the 1st of February, despite our repeated offers of help. Just sayin’<\/div>\n
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\"\"Me Too, Part II<\/h2>\n
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What is it about Brett Ratnor, the credibly-accused sex pest and ‘Melania’ movie director, (pictured here with Jeffrey Epstein and two redacted victims) that made him so appealing to President Trump’s inner circle?<\/div>\n
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\"\"Credibility Elegy<\/h2>\n
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Don’t know who this guy is, but he seems to have hit the nail on the head. [JD Vance: Remember when we learned that our wealthiest and most powerful people were connected to a guy who ran a literal child sex trafficking ring? And then that guy died mysteriously in a jail? And now we just don’t talk about it.]<\/div>\n
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\"\"(Girls FTW!)<\/h2>\n
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A play about just how toxic and icky you have to be that even Jeffrey Epstein can’t stomach you attending his parties.
\n*NOTICE: due to illness, the role of Elon Musk will be played by a large punnet of Play-Doh.<\/div>\n
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\"\"‘Melania’ Ticket Sales Update<\/h2>\n
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Ticket sales for ‘Melania’ are reportedly very poor. Apparently Melania hasn’t opened to something this small and underwhelming since the time she first slept with the President.<\/div>\n
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\"\"Oh! The Homan-ity!<\/h2>\n
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An exhibition about a Nazi blimp named Tom that is full of combustible gas.<\/div>\n
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\"\"Melania Review<\/h2>\n
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Sexual assaulter Brett Ratner’s ‘Melania’ documentary is out now, and our review is “even if they showed this on a trans-Atlantic flight, I would get up and walk out”.<\/div>\n
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\"\"The Diary of Otto Wels<\/h2>\n
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This Holocaust Memorial Day, we are showing a dramatization of the famous moment 1930s German opposition party leader Otto Wels called for the SA and SS to be “restrained, reformed and restricted”. The role of Wels will be played by Chuck Schumer, and understudy Hakeem Jeffries.<\/div>\n
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\"\"The $50,000 Question<\/h2>\n
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With Tom Homan replacing Greg Bovino as the ‘in-field commander’ for DHS agents, Minnesotans soon learn that their best defence is $50,000 in unmarked bills stuffed into a Cava bag.<\/div>\n
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\"\"Trumpelstiltskin<\/h2>\n
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A new adaptation, starring Greg Bovino as the imp. After President Trump allows him to spin gold fabrications, he demands the first-born child of all DHS officers, but even the President thinks he’s coming up short, and fires him.<\/div>\n
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\"\"Nuremberg, Pennsylvania<\/h2>\n
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A courtroom drama set during the 2029 MAGA Trials, where the ghoulish Stephen Miller, the only senior member of the regime to survive President Trump’s Deathbed Purge of November 2028, attempts to appeal against 254 concurrent life sentences for his role in the 2026 ICE Massacres.<\/div>\n
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\"\"New Gadsden Flag Unveiled<\/h2>\n
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To be waved at anyone wearing an SS-cosplay greatcoat. (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

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\"\"Snow White-Supremacist<\/h2>\n<\/blockquote>\n
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In which Kristi Noem tells the audience to “take a good long look in the mirror”, something she has been unable to do since adopting whatever the hell happened to her face. (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

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\"\"Why Somalis?<\/h2>\n
<\/div>\n
While your government continues to repeat easily-repudiated lies about the latest killing, our Dear Leader is wondering why people aren’t more focused on the ‘Somali Fraud’, perpetrated by Aimee Bock, a white Republican. Thankfully we know that it has nothing to do with our never-vengeful President being sexually rejected by Somali supermodel Iman in 1990. (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

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<\/h2>\n

\"\"Profiles in Cowardice<\/h2>\n
A 7-hander play featuring Democrat Reps Don Davis of North Carolina, Tom Suozzi of New York, Henry Cuellar of Texas, Vicente Gonzalez of Texas, Laura Gillen of New York, Marie Gluesenkamp Perez of Washington and Jared Golden of Maine who all voted to fund the regime’s Gestapo. Hopefully a career-ending play. (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

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<\/h2>\n

\"\"<\/h2>\n

Murder in Minnesota<\/h2>\n
The President’s untrained moronic thugs in the new Federal mobster-Gestapo have done it again. Again, the only safe place to be in America right now is in the Epstein Files. (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

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<\/h2>\n

\"\"Davos: A one-moron play in three acts<\/h2>\n
\n
\n

Following the disgrace that befell us all at Davos, let us be clear-eyed about this. We are now beyond parody. Beyond satire. This is neither drift nor decline. This is the most unqualified and ignorant president in American history by design. First he creates a crisis, then he TACOs, and now we await the toddler-tantrum.<\/span><\/p>\n

It is no accident that he is bigoted. Uninformed. Sexist. Xenophobic. Simply wrong. <\/span>He is the embodiment of his support: the resentment, self-hatred, victimhood, rage, bullying and yet also delight of ‘his people’. Perhaps you, the MAGA moron who is perversely proud that you are endangering yourselves, your neighbors, and the world. <\/span>That he is a man with the intellectual and emotional maturity of a toddler, mentally ill, a pathological liar who lies even about his own lies, is the desired outcome, not some accident of his obvious stupidity or senility. The venality, the toadying lackies born on third base who think they’re hitting a home run every day, The murderous intent, all from a group of people who were bullied so badly in high school that they need to take their revenge at scale. <\/span>It is no longer <\/span>a question of left vs right, democratic vs authoritarian, or even smart vs stupid. It is, quite simply, right vs wrong.<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Congress is a co-equal branch of government. History will record your next move, Senators and Representatives, for good or for ill.<\/span><\/p>\n

History will remember this moment. <\/span>For good. Or for ill.<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/h5>\n<\/div>\n

(Swipe\/scroll for more >)[\/vc_column_text][vc_column_text css=””]<\/p>\n

<\/h2>\n

\"\"Star Wars – Episode X<\/h2>\n
The latest instalment in the Star Wars Saga sees a reincarnated Emperor Palpatine join Trump’s prestigious Board of Peace, where he is joined by Lex Luthor, Doctor Doom, Bibi Netanyahu and the Crown Prince of Saudi Arabia. (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

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<\/h2>\n

\"\"Saucy Jeff – a Rock ‘n’ Roll musical<\/h2>\n
A new adaptation of the St. Hubbins\/Smalls-penned rock opera “Saucy Jack” brings this musical about friendship and sex crimes right up to date in the new location of Little Saint James, featuring Jeffrey Epstein as the protagonist. Starring Gary Busey as the President. Adapted by beloved genius Marti di Bergi and produced by E. Jean Carroll. (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

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<\/h2>\n

\"\"Frozen on Ice (2026)<\/h2>\n
This Disney remake features a rambling speech by a demented senile old moron who has never looked at a map, confusing Greenland with Iceland three times in one speech. (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

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<\/h2>\n

\"\"Wigs of the 17th & 18th Centuries (part 2)<\/h2>\n
An exhibition of the wigs worn by the founding fathers. The reason wigs were so prevalent in this era is because of rampant syphilis, which not only makes men go bald prematurely, it also makes them psychotically immune to empathy. It particularly affected very stupid men with zero understanding of anything but their own narcissism. Fortunately they can now use a comb-over. (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

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<\/h2>\n

\"\"Wigs of the 17th & 18th Centuries (part 1)<\/h2>\n
An exhibition of the wigs worn by the founding fathers. The reason wigs were so prevalent in this era is because of rampant syphilis, which not only makes men go bald prematurely, it also makes them psychotically immune to empathy. It particularly affected very short men with no moral compass in the first place. Fortunately they can now procure spray-on hair. (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

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<\/h2>\n

\"\"From The Team<\/h2>\n
We’d like to thank everyone for their support – we’ve been blown away by the number of Ko-Fi donations<\/strong><\/a>. Our mailbag is roughly 90% supportive. But we have noticed a slight uptick in hate mail, we assume a MAGA account has picked up on us. Consequently we would like to offer a heartfelt apology to those offended – if we knew y’all could read, we might have been kinder. (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

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<\/h2>\n

\"\"Fallout: The Musical<\/h2>\n
In this theatrical adaptation of the post-apocalyptic video game & Amazon TV franchise, the USA becomes a desolate wasteland after the EU & UK offload the $8 trillion of US debt they hold, all at once. (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

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<\/h2>\n

\"\"Cancellation: Annual Clown Parade<\/h2>\n
Regretfully, we have had to cancel this year’s annual Clown Parade. Sadly, we couldn’t find enough clowns this year, as they are all working for the White House’s Foreign Policy Unit. (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

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<\/h2>\n

\"\"The Fashions of ICE and the CBP<\/h2>\n
An exhibition of the style and flair of our talented fascist thugs<\/del> Federal agents. Featuring much more of the ‘Punisher’ logo than should be legal outside of a late-90s teenager’s basement. Masks and tac-gear are available to buy, including in child sizes ages 10-12 (as modelled here by Kommandant Greg Bovino). (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

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<\/h2>\n

\"\"Trump-Kennedy Center Honors Continue<\/h2>\n
The awards ceremony continues with our ‘Technical Honors’, awarding the President for ‘Most Unusually Quickly Healed Ear”. Sponsored by Ben Nye Stage Blood and followed by a screening of the Time Robbins classic movie ‘Bob Roberts’. (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

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<\/h2>\n

\"\"Snowflake Demands Participation Prize<\/h2>\n
After presenting President Trump with the Nobel Peace Prize that is rightfully his, Mar\u00eda Corina Machado demanded that she receive the Venezuelan Presidency as her consolation prize. That is what the headline is about, right? (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

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<\/h2>\n

\"\"Extremism Outreach Programs<\/h2>\n
Something we are very proud of at the Trump-Kennedy Center are our cultural & arts outreach programs against vile, racist and violent extremism. Since last summer we are proud to announce that we have reduced the number of people enrolled in violent white nationalist groups like the Proud Boys and Oathkeepers by 12,000. Entirely coincidentally, the Federal government has added 12,000 ICE officers in the same period. (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

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<\/h2>\n

\"\"Presidential Decorum<\/h2>\n
From JFK’s “Ask not what your country can do for you\u2014ask what you can do for your country” through to our current Dear Leader’s “Fuck you”, Presidents have always used powerful oratory to win over the hearts and minds of the ordinary Joe. (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

[\/vc_column_text][vc_column_text css=””]<\/p>\n

<\/h2>\n

\"\"Limitless<\/h2>\n
ICE agents acting with impunity, breaking international laws, indicting a Fed chairman you don’t like (and forgot you appointed). Limitless is the only kind of power to be had. Now showing in the Eric Trump Cinema (down the corridor, past the basement, through the puddles of aircon coolant and the first door on your far-right. Minimum Trumpcoin purchase of all your life-savings required for entry.) (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

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<\/h2>\n

\"\"An Honored Announcement<\/h2>\n
Given our recent history, it is our honor to be the first to announce that, following the DOJ’s indictment of Jerome Powell, the Federal Reserve is to be officially renamed the Donald J. Trump Federal Reserve for Hiding Financial Crimes. (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

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<\/h2>\n

\"\"The Niyazov Effect<\/h2>\n
A short play about how naming things after yourself is a comically obvious symptom of paper-thin narcissistic megalomaniacal sundowning. (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

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<\/h2>\n

\"\"Star Wars: the ICE Cut<\/h2>\n
This new edition of 1977’s classic Star Wars: A New Hope is just 14 minutes long, as Uncle Owen and Aunt Beru simply comply with the Stormtroopers and so are not killed in cold blood, thus saving the galaxy from years and years of rebellion and torment. (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

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<\/h2>\n

\"\"Stay Safe Out There!<\/h2>\n
Whether you are stuck in the DC snow, living in Venezuela\/Iran\/Greenland or just peacefully heading home in Minneapolis, remember to stay safe out there. The only truly safe place in this world is ‘in the Epstein Files’. (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

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<\/h2>\n

\"\"Mourning The ‘Bad Cop’ Character<\/h2>\n
Remember the ‘bad guy’ cops in 80s movies? Corrupt, incompetent, trigger-happy bullies who were often downright evil. We simply don’t see these characters in movies any more. Mostly that is because they’ve all been recruited by ICE and the CBP. (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

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<\/h2>\n

\"\"Every Accusation Is A Confession<\/h2>\n
A two-hander, this play deals with the narcissistic urge to confess your crimes in broad daylight. “Iran is shooting peaceful protestors like some sort of Gestapo”, “Cuba is run by senile old men”, “Maduro is corrupt”. Jon Voight stars as President Trump and Sylvester Stallone’s discarded botox injections play Marco Rubio. (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

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<\/h2>\n

\"\"The Architecture of the Trump Reich<\/h2>\n
An exhibition of the architectural wonders forthcoming under the new Welthauptstadt Washington, from the mighty Donald Josephine Trump Ballroom to Stephen Miller’s hollowed-out volcano lair. (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

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<\/h2>\n

\"\"The Producers<\/h2>\n
We are pleased to announce the return of ‘The Producers’ (in either “20 days” or “2 months”, depending on which senile pronouncement you believe). The play about a play will this time feature ‘Springtime for Trump (& Greenland)”, and the collapse of NATO and the rules-based world order as an epilogue. (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

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<\/h2>\n

\"\"Sleeping Beauty<\/h2>\n
A ballet about how a man’s long, slow blinking is accidentally mistaken for an elderly, unwell man falling asleep on his feet. Nurse! Nurse! Grandpa’s out of bed again.(Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

[\/vc_column_text][vc_column_text css=””]<\/p>\n

<\/h2>\n

\"\"Credit Where Credit’s Due<\/h2>\n
An operetta about the fact that Pete Hegseth didn’t invite any journalists into the Signal chat this time. (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

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<\/h2>\n

\"\"The Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Arrest Warrant<\/h2>\n
An exhibition of outstanding International Arrest Warrants, featuring Nicol\u00e1s Maduro, and only Nicol\u00e1s Maduro. (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

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<\/h2>\n

\"\"To End All Wars<\/h2>\n
A multi-media exhibition of themes from the New Times Bestseller, presented as farce, with narration by Marco Rubio (and a translation into Spanish by Nicol\u00e1s Maduro). Sponsored by ExxonMobil. (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

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<\/h2>\n

\"\"The Thin Red Line<\/h2>\n
Not the classic Terrence Malick movie about the War in the Pacific (bone spurs prevented us showing that) – this is about the aspirin-induced weakening of the blood\/brain barrier that commonly leads to TIAs, strokes and frontotemporal dementia. (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

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<\/h2>\n

\"\"Happy New Year!<\/h2>\n
We’re sorry we had to cancel our New Year’s Eve Concert, in its place we do have Rick Grenell playing the banjo piece from ‘Deliverance’. Time Zones sure are weird, it is already 2026 in Australia, still 2025 in Europe and 1937 here in D.C. (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

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<\/h2>\n

\"\"Our New Signage<\/h2>\n
Some people have suggested the President’s job numbers (unemployment at 4.6%, the highest in 4 years) are very poor. But all we know is that we added three jobs just to put the new lettering up. (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

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<\/h2>\n

\"\"Announcing the Bari Weiss Sculpture Garden<\/h2>\n
In honor of the protection of Free Speech*, the Bari Weiss Sculpture Garden will feature artworks of all the most famous Free Speech* warriors. From Ayn Rand and Russell Brand to Nick Fuentes and Candace Owens. No French allowed. (*by which we mean “speech we agree with”) (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

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<\/h2>\n

\"\"Marble Armrests!<\/h2>\n
We’re thrilled to announce the introduction of marble armrests in all our seats. There truly is nothing like it. Because your comfort is absolutely the least of our concern. (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

[\/vc_column_text][vc_column_text css=””]<\/p>\n

\"\"G.I. Jane<\/h2>\n
In this theatrical adaptation of the 1997 movie, Jane is forced to sit out combat training and given a job as a supply clerk where she orders $86M of erectile dysfunction drugs annually. Knocked up by her CO, she is then denied female reproductive healthcare. Because priapism is a national security issue, unwanted pregnancies are not. (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

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\"\"Paint It Black: The Art of Redaction<\/h2>\n
Redaction is \u2588\u2588\u2588\u2588\u2588\u2588\u2588\u2588\u2588\u2588, especially during the presidency of \u2588\u2588\u2588\u2588\u2588\u2588\u2588\u2588\u2588\u2588\u2588\u2588\u2588\u2588, who we all know is in the \u2588\u2588\u2588\u2588\u2588\u2588\u2588\u2588 Files doing some shady \u2588\u2588\u2588\u2588\u2588\u2588\u2588. (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

[\/vc_column_text][vc_column_text css=””]<\/p>\n

\"\"Stephen Miller: Ring Cycle<\/h2>\n
The White House Deputy Ubermensch conducts Wagner’s famous meisterwerk in concert with The Berliner Reichsorchester. (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

[\/vc_column_text][vc_column_text css=””]<\/p>\n

\"\"Herrenvolk Agitprop<\/h2>\n
For 80 years this art form was criminally under-used. Our exhibition rejoices in the DHS’ and Department of Labor’s reintroduction of it. (Swipe\/scroll for more >)<\/div>\n

[\/vc_column_text][vc_column_text css=””]<\/p>\n

\"\"Gold & Marble: A Study In Taste<\/h2>\n
An exhibition of artists disproving the adage ‘money can’t buy taste’. From Gaddafi to the Saudi Royals, all the best taste involves an excess of marble and gilt. But no guilt.<\/div>\n

[\/vc_column_text][vc_column_text css=””]<\/p>\n

Coming Soon…<\/h3>\n
\n
– Leni Riefenstahl: Misunderstood Genius?<\/div>\n
– Hillbilly Elegy: The Musical (with an epilogue dictated by Peter Thiel)<\/div>\n
– Ted Nugent vs Kid Rock: An anthropological study into who has the most existentially philosophical lyrics.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n

[\/vc_column_text][vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

[\/vc_column_text][\/vc_column][\/vc_row]<\/p>\n<\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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We couldn’t quite hit the threshold….<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"parent":0,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-4418","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry"],"yoast_head":"\nHome - The Trump-Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts*<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/trump-kennedycenter.org\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_GB\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Home - The Trump-Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts*\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"[vc_row 0=”” 1=”” 2=”\/>!important;background-position:” 3=”center” 4=”!important;background-repeat:” 5=”no-repeat” 6=”!important;background-size:” 7=”cover” 8=”!important;}“” full_width=”stretch_row_content_no_spaces” content_placement=”bottom” src=”https:\/\/trump-kennedycenter.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/03\/resistance.jpg” _et_uniqid=”et_custom_uniqid_new_6946e3ec3c06a”][vc_column width=”1\/6″][vc_empty_space height=”400px”][\/vc_column][vc_column width=”2\/3″][vc_single_image image=”4786″ img_size=”” alignment=”center” css=””] [vc_column_text css=””] Resistance We had hoped that we could sponsor some of our resistance heroes with your donations. We couldn’t quite hit the threshold....\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/trump-kennedycenter.org\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"The Trump-Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts*\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2026-03-13T08:55:32+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/trump-kennedycenter.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/03\/newstraits.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Estimated reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"37 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/trump-kennedycenter.org\\\/\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/trump-kennedycenter.org\\\/\",\"name\":\"Home - The Trump-Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts*\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/trump-kennedycenter.org\\\/#website\"},\"primaryImageOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/trump-kennedycenter.org\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/trump-kennedycenter.org\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/trump-kennedycenter.org\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2026\\\/03\\\/newstraits.jpg\",\"datePublished\":\"2019-07-14T12:52:40+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2026-03-13T08:55:32+00:00\",\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/trump-kennedycenter.org\\\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-GB\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\\\/\\\/trump-kennedycenter.org\\\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-GB\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/trump-kennedycenter.org\\\/#primaryimage\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/trump-kennedycenter.org\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2026\\\/03\\\/newstraits.jpg\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/trump-kennedycenter.org\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2026\\\/03\\\/newstraits.jpg\",\"width\":213,\"height\":200},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/trump-kennedycenter.org\\\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\\\/\\\/trump-kennedycenter.org\\\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"Home\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/trump-kennedycenter.org\\\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/trump-kennedycenter.org\\\/\",\"name\":\"The Trump-Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts*\",\"description\":\"The Revolution Will Be Satirized is an international collective of humorists, satirists and generally annoyed human beings shaking their fists in vain at the way the world is going down the tubes.\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\\\/\\\/trump-kennedycenter.org\\\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":{\"@type\":\"PropertyValueSpecification\",\"valueRequired\":true,\"valueName\":\"search_term_string\"}}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-GB\"}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Home - The Trump-Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts*","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/trump-kennedycenter.org\/","og_locale":"en_GB","og_type":"article","og_title":"Home - The Trump-Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts*","og_description":"[vc_row 0=”” 1=”” 2=”\/>!important;background-position:” 3=”center” 4=”!important;background-repeat:” 5=”no-repeat” 6=”!important;background-size:” 7=”cover” 8=”!important;}“” full_width=”stretch_row_content_no_spaces” content_placement=”bottom” src=”https:\/\/trump-kennedycenter.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/03\/resistance.jpg” _et_uniqid=”et_custom_uniqid_new_6946e3ec3c06a”][vc_column width=”1\/6″][vc_empty_space height=”400px”][\/vc_column][vc_column width=”2\/3″][vc_single_image image=”4786″ img_size=”” alignment=”center” css=””] [vc_column_text css=””] Resistance We had hoped that we could sponsor some of our resistance heroes with your donations. 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